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  1. I love this…my husband and I have been married 10 years in January …we married later he is in his early 40s and I am in my late 30s . We have a 2 and 5 year old whom i cherish and feel so blessed to have been chosen as their mom. I found this article encouraging as in our society I feel a lot of pressure to have “travel time” and “get away from your kids time” and I do agree that every couple needs alone and down time…we have a nightly date after bed time with our favorite TV show and making a point to go to bed at same time when possible. Friends can’t believe we have never (except for delivery of our 2nd) spent a night away from our kiddos. Yes an adult tropical vacation sounds amazing…but at this time in life we choose to have the kiddos come along or not go. Thanks for your post.

    1. My husband and I have “nightly dates” and make a point of going to bed at the same time every evening, too, Bekki. That habit was more than enough to keep us close and communicating during the seasons of life when we had very small children and very little money for fancy dates or get-away vacations. Now that our kids are older and finances aren’t as tight, we could now go out/away much more frequently — but the schedule we’ve maintained for the past 30+ years has worked so well that we seldom feel the need to do so.

  2. I love this posting and started reading the books you posted. I already read the first book on the list. Thank you for making this post!

  3. Hello Jennifer,
    I have been enjoying reading your posts about marriage and family. I am 28 and have a 3 yr old and a 7 month old. I have been married for 3yr +9 months. Hahaha.
    I’m insired by your love for God and learning how to live out your faith by serving your family and husband contrary to popular culture, by devoting your life to being a stay at home mom. I, also, am trying to do this.
    I liked your cute post about your recent trip and the cute button pins you took with you. Your husband is a good sport. Haha
    On topic of your time with your husband, does he ever feel the loss of alone time as a couple from having babies and children? Does this take a toll on your marriage? How do you and him cope with this?
    I feel a conflicting desire to have more children and a having more bonding time with my husband and growing our relationship. Could you tell me how your husband has grown closer through the years as you have added more babies? I don’t think these things are directly opposed but want to know how to better guide it. Thank you.

    1. I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed my posts and my books, Breanna, and wish you many long and joyous years of marriage with your husband of 45 months!

      As for whether my husband feels he is missing out on alone time, I’ve tried very hard during our 30+ years together to prioritize time with him so that he won’t feel marginalized. Especially as a homeschooling mom, it would be easy to pour so much energy into my children that I’d little left to offer him at the end of the day. But God convicted me early in our marriage that neglecting my husband would not be in anybody’s best interest — his, mine, or our kids’.

      So we’ve always set aside time to spend alone together, apart from the kids, each and every day.

      When our children were younger, we’d do this after they were in bed for the night. Now that they are older and frequently stay up later than we do, we just retreat to our bedroom after dinner and story time and let them know not to disturb us unless it’s an emergency. We are living proof that it is definitely possible to have a lot of children in your home and still enjoy a close relationship (and an active sex life) with your spouse.

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