Messy Beautiful Love {Review and Giveaway}

      14 Comments on Messy Beautiful Love {Review and Giveaway}

No marriage is ever beyond God's redeeming grace...Is your marriage struggling? Does it feel one-sided? Do you long for it to be more than it is?

Marriages are under attack as never before. Unfortunately, those attacks sometimes come not from without, but from within.

In Messy Beautiful Love, bestselling author Darlene Schacht discusses just such an attack on her own marriage — one that surely would have torn it apart were it not for God’s redeeming grace.

The biggest marital problems rarely begin big. Seldom are we slammed with something that materializes out of thin air. Our problems usually start out small and grow.

“If I were to pinpoint the one thing that led me to almost destroy my marriage,” Darlene writes candidly, “it would be that I was keeping a record of wrongs…. I took count of [all my husband’s] faults and kept track of each one.”

Do you ever do that? Do you harbor grudges against your husband or nurse resentment toward him in your heart? Be forewarned: doing so will lead you down a path you do not wish to follow.

“I had forgotten what 1 Corinthians says about love,” Darlene continues. “It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”

"Love is what is left in a relationship when the selfishness is taken out." - Nick Richardson

Love is unselfish. It puts the other’s interests ahead of its own. While love heals wounds, unforgiveness causes them to fester. When we keep a record of wrongs, we do so to our own detriment. When we give root to bitterness, our love gets choked out and our hearts grow cold, hard, and impenetrable.

“The problem here isn’t your husband,” Darlene explains. “It’s that your level of expectation for him is outshining his character. When you measure him against the weight of expectation, you are left with an unbalanced scale.

“Accepting a person for who he or she is doesn’t mean that you excuse sin. I’d never ask or want you to do that. What I am asking you to do is to look past the human frailty of a man to seek his beauty by removing the weight of expectation you hold. I’m asking that you walk in the grace of messy, beautiful love.”

Darlene opens the book with a prayer that her testimony would bring glory and honor to God, and that it does. Hers is a powerful story of hope and redemption that will powerfully impact the life of everyone who reads it.

Messy Beautiful Love

Messy Beautiful Love is a collection of important life-lessons learned — some of them the hard way — that you can take and apply to your own marriage. When you do, you will avoid many of the pitfalls the author points out along the way.

Want to read this book yourself? Darlene’s publisher has graciously offered to give a free paperback copy to one of my readers. Enter to win it here: a Rafflecopter giveaway

How Do I Love Thee? A Devotional Journal for Wives

14 thoughts on “Messy Beautiful Love {Review and Giveaway}

  1. Ivon Nakubilia

    mum hi,we have waken up.mum i would like to comment to all post you normally all that love life at home. they are very wonderful. encouragment. teachable. real in this life. continoue mum for that good job.keeping many family and home to God’s foundation.may God be whit you always ivon

  2. Shirley

    Listen, really listen, to what your sweetie is saying. Don’t interrupt until he is finished. Discuss, not argue, but discuss whatever the situation is. Stop and pray before reacting, you’ll be glad you did.

  3. rdfleming

    I am constantly looking for encouragement from older women with many years of experience being happily married, either written or spoken. I write quotes in my journal to re-read that keep me focused on the good work of staying engaged in a joyful marriage. I keep your latest book by my side of the bed to peruse right before bedtime, then I read I Cor. 13 in the amplified version to remind me what HIS love looks like. I am made in HIS image and should be able to give and receive love. Re-learning respect/honor and kindness in our every day speech and actions has been the latest project. Thank you for your “running” encouragement for wives. Thank you for sharing the lessons God is teaching you.
    Warmest regards,

  4. Melissa Livingston

    I think this was so beautifully said. My husband and I struggle to be gracious to each other and it’s such a hard lesson to re-learn.. sometimes multiple times a day. We are fortunate that our love supersedes our stubborn-ness, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t use help in getting past our issues.

  5. Rana HUrley

    The advice I would give a wife about avoiding pitfalls is to let go of expectations and to not keep a running tally of wrongs

  6. Mariza Valr

    This giveaway is awesome. I’ll be grateful if I win. But I hope The Lord blesses whoever is in really need. Blessings to you

  7. Karen C

    I have written on the inside of my Bible these words : “Never use your love for a person to change them but to in order to change yourself.” Also, it’s more important to maintain unity and peace in a relationship than to be right.

  8. Amanda

    Thank you for this wise post. In response to the question, over the past 11 years two big moments for me have been: Stormie Omartan’s reminder, “Lord change me” and Jennifer’s reminder to keep intimacy a top priority. God used both messages at key times. I look forward to what He will teach next and how He may allow me to minister to others.

  9. sdtanner

    I like the quote about love is what’s left when the selfishness is removed. So true. It’s hard to keep turning off your own needs and feelings to get to that. I’m going through a divorce now but have learned so much. I’m just really sad our marriage couldn’t be saved.

  10. Janie

    I was just listening to an old broadcast of Elenor Page on BBN yesterday where she used the Amplified version of 1 Corinthians 13 to gently open a young wife’s eyes to what real love is about and use that as a standard for her actions of love. I would live to read this book! I failed this test of loving my husband as in 1 Cor. just yesterday. Thank you, Lord for these reminders!


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